The waiting game!!!-Girl talk -part I
Welcome to this exciting series of the ‘waiting game’ . As we marinate on this interesting topic, that’s subject to occur on planet earth, lol! Incase you’re wondering what this term means. It is a trendy way of describing, those moments/time period in a single woman’s life, when the woman, thinks she is ready to be married and is technically waiting to be found by that “perfect partner” aka “her man”. This ”wait period” can be a bitter or sweet experience, depending on the surrounding factors and how one perceives it.
So, why am I blogging about my “waiting game”? Well, truth be told, life during this time has the tendency to become anxious-like and anything negative. It takes, discipline, pep-talks, self-confidence, positive affirmations, positive vibes, etc. anything positive one can think of, to sail through. I am definitely not excluded, lol! As a Christian , I truly believe the verse in the book of Proverbs 27:17 “as iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens the other” (NIV). I hope that someone’s countenance is lifted, and inspired to re-approach the “waiting game” with a positive mindset.
Few months after graduating from university in May of 2016, I received an interesting text message from my beloved dad. ” Congrats on your graduation! If you find a husband, hurry up and get married” Did you guys notice the phrase “if you find a husband” ? I bet you chuckled after reading the text message , lol! Honestly, I was thinking to myself, is his Bible missing that portion of that clearly states, ‘ he who finds a good wife, finds a good thing and obtains favor from God . Notice the key word, he who finds and not the other way around. Apparently, someone missed the memo!!
Honestly, I was not surprised because, in a typical Nigerian household, one of the ultimate goals, that shows your accomplishment as a female child, is the expectation to be married. On a serious note, a female child can have all the degrees on planet earth, without that ring on your left finger, you have not arrived. Lol! Marriage is seen as the culmination of success, as opposed to seeing it as a part of God’s many blessings.
It is not uncommon to hear friendly reminders such as, when are you inviting us? When are we coming over to eat your rice? When are you introducing us to our in-laws? Some literally have no shame, they will tell you to your face that you are getting old and need to produce grand kids. The struggle is real guys!!
Here is my argument, there is no where in the Bible that states a cut off age for marriage and child bearing. I am quite aware of the evidence based research on the woman’s biological clock and the correlation of its level of effectiveness as age advances. On several occasions, God has dumbfounded the wisdom of men , and performed the miracle of childbearing. Mama Sarah, Elizabeth, Rachel , virgin Mary etc. are proofs of such testimonies.
I wonder why it’s so easy to trust God for miracle of finances, career growth, healing, deliverance, etc. but it’s difficult to trust God for the miracle of marriage. Isn’t it the same God? Or is there is a specific one reserved for marriage?..lol! Do we rather rush into some holy matrimony with some fool, that will keep one fasting and praying, for eternity? I don’t know about y’all, fasting is not my favorite thing to do, lol!! How much more fasting for some fool to change his attitude, just saying..!
To be continued…!
#this nigerian_chic♡ ♡
********Disclaimer-I am not a relationship expert!*******
You know what we say, marriage is work! So like any other job, most likely it’s not the employer that is going to come knock at your door and beg you to come work for them. Barely the employer will post a general ad somewhere and collect many applications ! If you do want that job – marriage :)) – you need to post your application at the proper places & go on to pass those interviews!!! …..
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Lol! I love your perspective ♡
Can’t wait for part 2. Awesome write up.
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Thanks girlie ♡
Akudo, that was a great one from you! There is wisdom in what Christina posted too. As per reference to her comment, I mean in the sense of exposure to fellowships and gatherings where people of same belief, vision might be and connected. From experience (not generalized), most connections come from people one has had contact with sometimes or places in life. That does not necessarily mean making that the primary focus of the exposure….but giving room for high possibilities, discovery, and knowledge of others. I know the challenge to this in the environment we find ourselves is the inflexibility in time to keep up with such activities. However, there’s always a place for divine intervention and connection which is beyond human comprehension. Prayer is key here and living a life unto God’s glory until the time appointed!
As a man and in God’s household, I know some good guys are shy or afraid of the unknown in making the moves. Certainly, there are awesome and qualified single men looking out for great singles like you for marriage, but it takes divine connection for a good to meet with the good. Am coming to discover that getting a right wife or husband to marry is the biggest task God saddled on the man after Adam blamed God. Genesis 3:12-20 Then the man said, “The woman whom You gave to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I ate.” Don’t get me wrong here, God will guide his children by Holy Spirit but the final CHOICE depends on the man and woman.
Anyway, always keep cool, be praying and watching, and doing the needful as a woman/man, and God will give you peace and joy that surpasses the understanding of man in due time.
God bless you beloved.
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Love your perspective!